saturday april 5, 2008
.flirt to convert
Recognize that her being at Vintage to hear God's Word spoken, sung, and lived out in front of her will never be a bad thing. Isaiah 55:11-12, says, "So shall My Word be that goes forth. It shall not return unto Me void but shall accomplish what I please." So, her being surrounding with quality people, a cool environment, and a context of worshipping God is not going to be a bad deal.
However, your motives (or lack of romantic motive) need to be very clear to her. She needs to see the authenticity in your actions, character of your heart, and consistency of your words. Women will read into every little action and word from you, whether you have motive in them or not (this was valuable insight provided to me from Laura, my amazing wife, who knows the female mind waaaaay better than me!). So, if you ask her to come to Vintage again, she may very easily read that you are interested in her romantically. You can innocently ask if she is coming back to Vintage, without asking her to come to Vintage. Did you catch the subtle difference there? To us guys, this difference may be immaterial. But to girls, it is everything. Just asking if she is coming to Vintage demonstrates a lower level of romantic interest than asking her to come to Vintage...but still reflects your concern for her hearing and seeing truth.
So, don't drop the entire Vintage subject, but tread carefully.
Is she wants to come, but needs a ride, don't pick her up for Vintage alone. Ask one of your female friends to pick her up, or take a female friend or two with you to pick her up.
Also, don't linger with her all night while you are at Vintage. Introduce her to some great Christian girls who you trust and who can hang out with her at Vintage. Let her see what healthy Christian friendships look like. Don't feel like you need to be her support system and crutch. Make sure she clearly sees that your stance on dating non-Christians is a real heart commitment. She will completely respect that and if she is changed by Jesus, then she will dig your authentic commiment even more.
posted by kemper lewis